Raam Daas Puri 2

Mostly-true account of a White Tantric day at Summer Solstice.

10... 11 ........ 12 ............... 13 .... I stood on my yoga mat doing frog poses (for those of you who don't know what a frog pose is - it's where you squat and then heave your body upwards; and then repeat - all the while using your breath like there is no tomorrow) - anyways, when you are doing frog poses, tomorrow is the last thing on your mind. The only thing on your mind is how to survive the next heave up.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the facilitator move towards the mic - "Aha! This is it!" my mind shouted in joy; she is going to say, "Relax" and that will be the end of this pose.

But what did I hear? "Keep up!!"

Ahhh, come on ... I can't keep up much longer, I'm dying, you hear me? .... 14 ..... Ahhh, I curse all the frogs and their poses - and come to think of it, I have never seen a frog repeatedly doing this pose - why should humans have to do it?! I thought we were on top of the food chain - why do we have to imitate the lowly amphibians? ... 15 .....

She's moving towards the mic again... this is it, THIS IS IT!!

"Half way there!" she said sweetly. YIPES! I looked around to check on my partner (who looked half my age but was only a decade and half younger - more about that in a minute ... after I die)... he kept on going strong! Everyone kept on going strong - except Yours Singh Truly.

I looked up and I swear I saw an angel laughing his head off at me!! I couldn't believe it - out of the infinite number of caring angels in the heavens, I get Peeves!! For those who don't have children, Peeves is the naughty spirit at Hogwarts. What? You don't know Hogwarts either? Well, that's the school that Harry Potter went to. If you don't know Harry Potter, then you obviously have been spending the last few decades in a cave up in the Himalayas - if so, I have one (long) word for you (after I bow to you)... OOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGG!

I stuck out my tongue at Peeves. That made roll over in laughter.

Ok, Ok, I breathed - this too shall be over! And sure soon enough, "Inhale" came the command. "Hold, hold, hold...." OMG, I am dying... "Relax!" I flopped on the floor. Sweat dripped from every pore...and from every pore's pore. I looked at my young partner for some sympathy .... naah wrong place - a wide grin danced across his young face from young ear to young ear (not sure if I mentioned this - he looked half my age but was only a decade and half younger). He looked at me, I immediately smiled and gave him the thumbs-up sign. "Piece of cake, give me more!" I said in the best macho voice I could muster. He smiled sympathetically.

"26 more frogs!" - I couldn't believe it - somebody listening in to my wishes had granted the wrong one at the wrong time!!

2 minutes later, I dropped and flopped again - I had managed only 6 frogs (and a couple of tadpoles). How would I ever survive the day? I asked myself.

Let me just step back and tell you about the beginning of the day. Well, the previous day, this person, who I will call Niraj (although that's not her real name - in fact, her name doesn't even start with a N, it starts with a "R" and "upinder" comes after that. You might ask why use the name "Niraj"? Great question! Well, because she reminds me of this great friend I had during my College days (yes, I did attend College). Actually, I don't want to reveal my College friend's real identity either, so let's just call her Nargis. Mainly because she looked like Nargis, the Bollywood yester-year star. Anyways, Nargis married this great spiritual guy Vijay, who we all called Gandhi, because he reminded everyone of Gandhi...). But that's another ahimsa story...

So "Niraj" had promised to be my partner today. She is this strong, spiritual soul who just draws people to her like a magnet. Not sure why she even bothers with me; but I think I remind her of herself ... before she became spiritual and strong.

Anyway, I got pretty excited about being her partner. I always hoped for a really spiritually strong partner who would give me the strength to go through some of the tough spots. But she met me that morning and announced casually that she had found a new partner ... AND (to put masala to the wound) she had the gall to introduce me to him!!!

Well, he didn't look like much. I counted just three ways it could be argued that he could possibly be better than me – 1) better-looking, 2) physically fitter and 3) more spiritual. Other that, he had nothing on me, nothing! (ok, maybe he was 3 or 4 decades younger too). I told Niraj (in my mind) "Sure go ahead ... you will come crawling back to me when... when... ," I couldn't think of anything, so I stuck out my mind's tongue at her third eye, "whenever!"

Anyway, out of her pitying heart, she found me another partner and introduced me. As it turns out, this guy, Karen (not real name, real gender though - why "Karen" and not some boyish name like .. I dunno ... "Alex", you ask - mainly because he reminded me of this great friend I had in Grad school - ok, ok, not actually in Grad school but how else could I have casually mentioned that I have been to Grad school?).

Karen turned out to be my long-lost brother and who, at the end of the day, kept punching me in the arm like younger brothers do. We became such good buddies, that we giggled literally for hours on end - and he turned out to be one of the highlights of my trip; but that's another gigglish story.

Let's just get back to the exercises. So we start this long 31 minutes exercise - "keep your eyes 9/10th closed, look at the tip of your nose and listen to the mantra." I felt determined to have a spiritual experience. And it did come; almost at the end. I saw this blue light shimmering in front of my eyes. I got really excited and couldn't wait to tell my partner.

His muted reaction seemed a little unenthusiastic. He smiled and asked me what shade of blue I had seen - I described it. He pointed to the yoga mat we were sitting on, "Perhaps this color?"

"Uh.." I said blankly (I'm good at saying "Uh" blankly ... but more about that later). Karen smiled sympathetically.

I couldn't believe it! I had been looking, through my 9/10th closed eyes, at my blue mat! I abruptly got up, mumbling, "bathroom" and went looking for someone to share my experience with. This Karen guy... yeah he may have been my long-lost brother and we may have giggled a lot, but what did he know about spiritual experiences?!! Nothing! I tell you, nothing! He had barely even been born when I had my first one - this time a friend named Mushrooms (real nickname) showed up at my apartment building ("Stoner Manor") with a wicked guitar and some really goooood herbs. But that's another smokey story...

Back to the tantric - so I saw this person sitting there looking miserable, rubbing her shoulders. I thought she is the one I can surely impress with my blue-light experience. I approached her, "Tough day, eh?" She brightened up like a flower, "Not at all - I had the best experience! I saw this Being come and touch the top of my head and I had mega-downloads of wisdom. It felt fantastic. Did you have any experiences?"

"Uh.." I said blankly (I think I mentioned I'm good at blankly saying "Uh").

"Well," I began, "I saw this amazing blue light... totally different from the color of the yoga mat I sat on.."

She raised her eyes skeptically, "Oh?"

I leaned close to her and whispered, "To tell you the truth, my mat is not even blue, it just appears bluish in this light...".

"Ahh, that's wonderful, really. But would you mind NOT stepping on my sheepskin .. it has high vibrations, you know?"

I suddenly had to go the bathroom again; she smiled sympathetically.

Well, lunch time finally rolled around and it was time for ... tantric burgers. And what comes after tantric burgers?

Tantric burger gas!

Karen is an engineer of some kind and he suggested we use the gas for fuel - precisely that moment our giggling started; I suggested it might be better suited for anesthesia.

The good thing about everybody eating the same thing is that you can't really distinguish the gas inevitably produced - so it could be anybody - I kind of depended on this little fact. And I had picked up a really good tip from Niraj/Nargis (yes, the aforementioned partner-dumping one) - that you let out gas right after a long group inhale and just before the mul bandh (those of you who don't know about mul bandh ... well... it's ... kinda like ... lemme get back to you on that one).

Anyway, I used that really great tip during the post-lunch warm ups. And when it came time to inhale again, the coast had, ahem, cleared ... but when I looked up, Peeves lay there pretending to have passed out! While all the other angels gathered around; pointing their astral fingers at me; and shaking their astral heads in a sad sort of way.

Great! Exactly what I need - an astral guilt trip!

~~~~~

The exercise began again and then it happened!

After a 31 minute long exercise of "keeping up" while in excruciating pain, I suddenly stopped experiencing any pain at all; instead I started watching the body experiencing it. I completely became aware of every part of my body and knew exactly which position (spine straight, arms stretched out completely) reduced the discomfort that the body (not I) felt. I stretched up - Karen gave me a short smile - he knew I had caught on.

At the mental level, my mind just zoomed away to wide skies and remote snowed-packed mountain tops. A Sikh master had told me long time ago that when the mind becomes high, it seeks solitude. Solitude away from humans, animals and even the subtle "I am-ness" of vegetation. The mind feels scrubbed clean and it wants to go where the most pure and formless WaheGuru energy can be found.

I knew in that state, I could have an answer to any question I had. I asked the question that had been bothering me a lot lately, about my ego (you may have noticed from my writings that I have a major ego issue).

Up there in the mountains, I had become super-sensitive to my ego. In fact, within a minute, I could detect several ego-loaded thoughts arising within me. They hurt in a heart-shriveling sort of way; shrinking me away from me!

The question I asked was, "How do I kill the ego?"

The answer came: You cannot kill the ego. But you can choose to step out of it. There are only two states your mind can exist in - SatNaam or Ego. When you are in SatNaam, you are not in ego; and vice-versa, when you are in ego, you are not in SatNaam. These two states are mutually exclusive.

I promised that I will be in SatNaam with each breath (and kept the promise for the most part while I was up there).

Then the major one happened!

This is the hardest one to explain and perhaps the least interesting one on paper; but the most profound one for me. It happened during a 62 minute exercise while listening to mool mantra.

Mool mantra, like a Sikh Master once told me, is the most powerful mind-cleansing mantra available. In fact, the master suggested mixing it with the WaheGuru mantra just to ground it. There is a story about Baba Bhouche Vale, a great spiritual Sikh, who only meditated on the mool mantra all his life and had to cover his eyes at all times because they became so intensely powerful that they would set bushes to fire!

I hadn't given that story much thought - until then. In one exercise, I knew the power behind white tantric.

And it is this: after we (with vigorous body and breath exercises) have dislodged the mind from it's perceived "reality"; it becomes rootless; we take that opportunity to make it *listen* to powerful mantras. With the power of the mantras, it is flung back to it's original reality - the one which existed before thoughts invaded it. And it loves it! It is powerful, pure and wonder-filled again.

I saw and felt ... nay, experienced the formless One - WaheGuru - peering out of Karen's eyes. My jaw literally dropped and my eyes opened in wonder! So that's where you are! I said. Not only in Karen's eyes but in all eyes; in all forms of life.

There is no one to fear; because the One in all (including me) was my Beloved One! Loving me, watching me and delighting in every part of my existence (no matter how small and insignificant).

(Guru Amar Daas jee, sggs 440)
O my mind,
you are the embodiment of the Divine Light - recognize your own origin.
the Dear One is with you;
through the Guru's Teachings, enjoy the Dear One's Love.

I smiled through the rest of the exercises and indeed through the rest of my time up there in the mountains.

~~~~~

PS: As an epilogue, after I returned home; I remained relatively joyful. But I did feel some of the joy leaking out slowly. How much it leaked out I felt acutely when I attended a keertan 12 days after I had returned.

During the keertan, I saw that my ego had regained complete control of me. It had slowly (but very very surely) covered me up in it's suffocating "darkness" again. But I am wise (read old) enough to not get too depressed about it - like a writer once wrote,

Be grateful for the gifts you have received, not remorseful for the ones you haven't.

Raam Daas Puri 1

Semi-fictional account of my first Summer Solstice. Some of the ideas are by my wise-for-her-age 9-year-old daughter RasNaam.

"It hasn't rained here in weeks," lamented the driver, "too hot and dusty!"

I hadn't expected anything less - this was summer in New Mexico after all. We were on the shuttle from the airport. The driver was less interested in driving, more in conversation. Mostly about how much he loved his 6th or 7th daughter from his 3rd or 4th wife. He was a sweet guy but when it comes to drivers, I prefer mine to be safe first; then they can be sweet, talky and impatient.

We stopped at the gas station to get water. I noticed another driver of a parked van listening to music full-blast through his earphones (still the sound made it to me). Boy, I thought, drivers sure are plenty safe here in this land of enchantment.

I was the first out of the store. And I noticed an old woman bent over and moving ever slowing behind the parked van. To my horror I realized the driver was backing up (still listening to music) and hadn't noticed the lady. I shouted out but neither the old lady nor the driver (surprise, surprise) paid me any attention. Without further thought I lurched forward and just managed to push the lady out of harm's way - but couldn't do the same for my own body - the van brushed my left hip. I fell besides the old lady with a cry. The van backed away and went merrily on it's away without a care in the world.

I quickly asked the lady if she was OK - she was. She saw me grimace and quickly put her hand on my left hip and closed her eyes. I might have imagined it but I felt a lot of heat coming from her hand - healing heat. I felt the pain dissipating and within a minute, my hip was almost perfect. She opened her eyes and once again, I might have imagined it (New Mexico Sun can do wonders for budding spiritualists) but I saw a bluish light in her eyes. She said something in her native American Indian language and got up with surprising agility and left me staring after her as she disappeared behind the store.

Our driver meanwhile came to me and asked what I was doing on the ground. I mumbled something - he helped me up (told you he was sweet) and I repeated the lady's mutterings to him. He looked at me curiously and asked me where I had heard it, but he didn't wait for an explanation (told you he was impatient) and said, "May your deepest wish be granted"

"Uh ..." I said blankly (I am quite good at saying "Uh" blankly).

"That's the translation," he explained, "Say, lemme show you the cutest picture of my 6th or 7th daughter from my 3th or 4th wife...."

~~~~~

We reached a long dusty upwards road with "Dangerous Curves" warning signs all over the place. The driver decided this was the perfect time to make up for all the time lost in the store and hit the gas. He also decided one of his hands was enough for the wheel - with the other he pointed out various landmarks to us. Perhaps he envisioned himself a dangerous guide rather than just a mere dangerous driver.

He also explained about the mountain we were climbing, "Our people used to meet here every century as a Nation. Then bad things happened and we stopped. But in our legend, a group of spiritual people wearing white clothes were going to show up and start meeting here regularly - for spiritual well-being of the planet, you know. When such people arrived, our elders gave them this land. And here you are," he laughed loudly, "wearing white!"

Despite the best intentions of our driver, we arrived safely at top of the 7,000 feet mountain and a pretty angel of lady came and greeted us with "Welcome home!"

The air felt was different at home - "permeated with divinity" as someone put it. I walked around seeing the people milling around - laughing and enthusiastic for the coming days. Whenever anyone found out it was my first time here, they said a few words of wisdom and advice. The advice I took to heart was "if there is only one daily program you can attend while you are here, make it Sadhana - the early morning meditation".

Determined, I slipped into my sleeping bag at 9pm, but my body and my mind, perhaps due excitement and tiredness, refused to comply. I lay for minutes; many long minutes ... hours trying every relaxing exercise I knew, but to no avail - at about midnight I decided I wasn't going to make it for the first morning Sadhana after all - I promptly fell asleep.

~~~~~

At exactly 2:30am I heard someone playing music really loud. I groggily got up and peered through my tent window wondering who would be doing this. I saw a rather majestic looking man, with a long beard and beautiful turban singing. There were others around him surrounding my tent (doesn't anybody take their sleep seriously anymore?). The man sang with clear and powerful voice,

Rise up Rise up sweet family dear
a time of the lord and remembering
love is here
love love is all you will say
if you are awake and rise up right away
Lord will bless in so many ways
if you will rise up right now
and sing this praise

The singers moved away and my mind shouted, "Go back to sleep, you can't function on 2 hours of sleep!" My body creaked and complained noisily. But my heart sang loud and clear "RISE UP!" I listened to my heart and jumped out my sleeping bag.

And I am glad I did - the morning air and the full moon created a breathtakingly beautiful scene. After a quick refreshing shower, I headed to the meditation shelter. There were already hundreds of people there.

The Sadhana started and the time passed wonderfully. I felt nourished and filled. The Sadhana music kept filling me more and more until I felt I would burst, and burst I did when a mourn-full voice sang,

ik ardas bhat keerat kee guru raam daas rakho saraniae
Guru Raam Daas, only one prayer I ask of thee - keep me in your sanctuary

My heart spilled over - I covered my head with my shawl and freely wept. Every time the voice sang "Guru Raam Daas" I felt waves of beauty arise out of my depths. It was too much for me and the only way to express this was to cry with joy.

My mind, for once, just stood aside quite befuddled; not knowing how to handle this situation. My heart seized this opportunity and washed me with it's nectar. In a rare instance, I felt that I deserved this love, this joy, this bliss. I realized it was my birthright to receive this love - I had just denied that to myself for a long time.

After the songs ended, I needed solitude. I knew as soon as I started talking, my mind would take control again and would dilute this feeling of depth and wonder - I headed towards the sunrise into the meadows. I sang the Guru's words and experienced an awe of the Guru's word - how can it be so deep, so perfect, so beautiful, so intimate?

The rising sun made the clouds gloriously golden and fresh. I found a nice shady spot and lay on it. As I did so, I felt a slight pain in my left hip and remembered the previous day's events. The magical lady had granted me a wish - I closed my eyes and vibrated, "My deep wish is to see you, Guru Raam Daas!"

Almost immediately, I shot out of my body. I was lunging forward at the perhaps the speed of light. Quite surprisingly it didn't feel strange to be out of my body and moving so fast; rather I felt free and exhilarated in anticipation of the adventure awaiting me.

~~~~~

In the distance, far far distance - perhaps billions of light years away - I saw a golden star shimmering with light and life. I knew this was my destination. I shouted the Guru's words with glee and added my own gibberish and nonsense. The star grew bigger and bigger; and more and more beautiful. My shouting soon stopped in complete awe of the beauty and love emitting out of this heavenly star. I gaped at it - how could such beauty even exist? I wept and sobbed; and like a mad man, kept muttering, "love love love". I knew if someone had asked me to sacrifice my very own self in exchange for a place on this star, I would have gladly done it.

To my disappointment, I slowed as I got closer and soon came to a complete halt. By now, the star filled the see-able Universe. It seemed infinite in all directions. Cool blissful waves of love emitting from it washed through me. I lunged towards it - hoping to touch it even though I knew it was still billions of light years away; yet I couldn't resist the magnetic pull and kept trying.

Finally I gave up and just hovered there waiting for something to happen.

After what appeared to an eon, it dawned on me that perhaps my journey was over. With that thought, I began moving backwards. I shouted out, "No!" and with all my might and concentration vibrated, "Guru Raam Daas!" I immediately halted.

A zooming bright pure white light - perhaps the size of our Sun, detached itself from the illuminating star and moved towards me. Hope buoyed me up again.

Its brightness too vast and penetrating to look directly into, I shielded my eyes as the light came close. I bowed and murmured, "Guru Raam Daas..." because only the Guru could be so beautiful and powerful at the same time. The light laughed mirthfully, "Sorry dude, no Guru! But the Guru's Garbage man ... at your disposal!".

Astonished I looked up. The light shone from a man dressed in all white. Emitting lightening-like brilliance, he shimmered beauty and wonder. If this is how the Guru's servant appeared, I wondered how the Guru would look. After staring at him in wonder for a considerable amount of time, I pointed to the star and asked, "Raam Daas puri?" He looked a bit puzzled. I asked again (or rather I thought because all communication here occurred via thoughts only), "Is that the home of Guru Raam Daas?"

The man laughed heartily. "No, my young friend, that is Guru Raam Daas!"

But of course! Now it made perfect sense. I had expected Guru Raam Daas to be a person, but the pictures I had seen of him were only his earthly form. I witnessed the presence of Guru Raam Daas in the true form! I gaped and gawked. Infinite beauty beyond words the finite mind could conjure filtered through the shambles of my senses flooding me with what can only be called love. Helplessly I repeated over and over "WahGuru WahGuru WahGuru WahGuru WahGuru WahGuru WahGuru..."

The man in white pointed downwards. To my surprise, I saw my body lying in the Sun absorbing rays of light emanating from the Guru. I marveled seeing other millions of beings surrounded and protected by the Guru’s miraculous love and brilliant energy. I bowed prostrating myself before the Guru and the Guru's wondrous ways.

I could have contently stayed there for an eternity but we both knew my time was up. I reluctantly turned to go, but the man in white grinned, and said with a twinkle in his eyes, "Watch this, young traveler ... Ek Ong Kaar!"

The Universe flickered.

Glad that it wasn't over yet, I exclaimed, "Wow! What was that?"

Mirthfully the man in white declared, "Ek!"

I watched as everything - stars, galaxies and space - completely vanished. I blinked and rubbed my eyes to be sure, but nothing at all could be seen. "This is before anything was created; only the Formless One - WaheGuru - existed," I heard the man in white say. Although everything had disappeared, incredible sensations and feelings of pure joy, clear awareness and unexplainable beauty washed through me. The only word that comes remotely close to describing that feeling was love - true, intoxicating, cleansing, beautiful, pure Love. It became clear to me the Formless One is love!

The Man in white uttered, "Ong Kaar."

From the Formless One, an energy tsunami sound wave explosion "Ong" occurred; surging forth the living visible vibration as rippling light and sound - bringing into being all the stars and the galaxies. "This is how it started," the man in white explained.

I wanted to see more - I reverently whispered "Sat!"

A multi-dimensional screen suddenly sprang up and surrounded us. The screen showed images of Earths history going backwards. We saw the Iron Wall falling; then we saw how it had been built. We observed the British leaving India and next their conquering it. This process sped up until we were seeing millenniums passing within micro-seconds. We saw the dinosaurs disappearing and then appearing on Earth. We went back even further until Earth did not exist; further back we saw the "Ong" contracting back into the Formless One and nothing, except the Formless One, existing. The screen blanked out at this point.

The man in white exclaimed brightly, "You ain't seen nothing yet, Sonny!"

Suddenly, the screen erupted again. This time reeling backwards at lightening speed. I could see many great civilizations being built and destroyed in a blink. Then I would see an "Ong" contracting back into the Formless One. The incredibly swift rate at which this occurred made me feel queasy in my astral tummy as we witnessed millions of "Ong"s contracting back into the Formless One in a single millisecond; the velocity ever-quickening. The man in white asked, "Enough?"

I nodded.

But someone didn't think so - the screen erupted again and this time we went into the future. We saw destruction of everything except the Formless One and then "Ong" being emitted again and the creative cycle restarting. This time, thankfully, the screen flickered out after showing just a few incidences which had made it clearly obvious that these cycles occur endlessly, both in the future and past.

The man in white said, "What is common in all this?" Without waiting for an answer, he replied, "Sat. All else comes and goes; but Formless One doesn't go any-where ... any-time."

Completely blown away, I realized the immateriality of my tiny life to be nothing but an invisible speck on the one of an infinite number of life spectrums. To say that I felt insignificant would be the understatement of the last million Ong cycles.

"Naam!" I ventured. We went back to the Formless One state. This time the Ong sound wave exploded out in slow motion. We could see the vibrations of kaar forming infinite little balls comprised of light photons (for a lack of better word). Each light photon itself had several material outer layers of pure physical sound energy covering inner layers of less and less physical; and more and more subtle spiritual energy. At its very core, the immaterial substance of the "material" matter of the Formless blended into One. (I know, I know, it's kind of hard to explain, but using form-full words to explain form-less stuff is tough).

The man in white chuckled deeply, his eyes twinkling like miniature Universes igniting and diminishing as he explained, "This Naam - the "WaheGuru" we say is only the outer part of Naam - with meditation, we go deeper; deeper leaving the "am" of self until we reach the "am" of Formless One. The true purpose of reciting naam is to reach the Formless One!"

"Karta" I whispered. The giant multi-dimensional-screen reappeared. This time it had a simple picture of a single white cell of a Monarch butterfly.

The cell had just being fertilized and it was lying there all small and helpless - suddenly the screen went into a finer, detailed mode. It showed the Formless One, via Naam, actively managing this cell!! I really thought I couldn't possibly go into a deeper awe, but there I was. The great, infinite, powerful-beyond-imagination Formless One was managing a small white cell just as an Empress would manage a great empire!! All microscopic activities within the white cell were being directed by the Formless One; tiny and unique life forms were being created and destroyed to accomplish the given task.

I, of course, had heard that the real doer of everything is WaheGuru, but to see WaheGuru being the real do-er at even the minutest level stunted me into dumb silence. It is not everyday that you realize you have been wrong about everything in your life - I had believed it was I who was in control; it was I who did everything. But in reality, I was nothing, did nothing and could do nothing. I felt small and was overwhelmed so much with helplessness that I started muttering gibberish.

The man in white came close to me and held me in his arms. I felt calm again. The feeling of helplessness slowly lifted and instead I felt completely free. Joyfully free. There was nothing to worry about! There was nothing expected of me! Huge burdens of guilt and unrealistic expectations left me. I felt like a child in a mother's lap. Feeling so free, so beautiful, so alive and so unconditionally loved, tears of gratitude welled up making it impossible not to weep. How could I possibly be loved so much?

"One more,' the man in white said, "Purakh!".

Like when you wear those laser-detecting glasses and suddenly you see lasers all over the place, I saw the formless One permeating everything. There was absolutely no place, no matter how tiny, where WaheGuru was not. I looked at myself and realized that I too was completely permeated with the Formless One. In fact, there was no space left for me to exist!

I looked up in wonder at the man in white and he smiled, "Yes, it is you!" There! Within moments of being completely wrong about everything, I was proven wrong again. Indeed, I was everything! I had done everything and I and the formless One were One - there was no other. There never had been another and there never will be another. The duality had been an illusion - I did not exist - only the Formless One did!

For a few glorious moments, an incredible power drew me in and engulfed me. I lost all feeling of being separated. Whatever I experienced as outside myself seemed actually to be coming from within. No difference existed between me and that which I felt. I melted into love. Love came from my very core. I no longer existed as anything but love. The same Formless One being that I experienced outside, I experienced 'being' from within.

"Our real self is formless," the man in white murmured softly, "but you can't have everybody walking around feeling like this!" He smacked me softly on the head and I became separated again; but I now knew the Truth. Actually I re-knew. I had known this all along but had forgotten. And this time I would not forget, I promised the Guru.

The man in white smiled. I smiled back and laughed. He strongly hugged me and whispering, "Enough of sight-seeing - now go SERVE!" he gave me a gigantic push that sent me hurtling back to my body.

Within moments, I slammed back to my body - the first thing I felt was raindrops on my face - sweet, fresh, earthly raindrops. Just as I slowly got up; relishing the breath flowing in and out of my body; I heard the man in white bellow, "And don't forget to see God in all!"

I got up drunk with joy and eagerly looked around and forward to ... the rest of my human experience.

Goodbyes

Bhai Sahib Vir Singh jee, perhaps the greatest modern Sikh spiritual writer, once was sent a message from his old college friend who he had lost touch with since college. His friend was in the hospital and asked Bhai Sahib to visit him there urgently. Surprised and also eager to serve, Bhai Sahib promptly went to the hospital. His friend was dying and the doctors had given him a few weeks to live.

His friend was not at all spiritual oriented. Seeing Bhai Sahib he started weeping and said: "I have led a wasteful and useless life. Now death approaches and I am afraid."

Bhai Sahib was very soft hearted (read his books and you will attest to this) and said: "There is always mercy in the Guru's house - start meditating on the Guru's Word - SatNaam WaheGuru".

It is a common saying that a drowning man will hold on to a twig with all his might. So his friend dived deeply into Word meditation. Bhai Sahib came back home and gradually forget about his friend (he was never close to him during college years).

A few weeks later, Bhai Sahib had a dream about his friend. His friend was sitting atop the berry tree at the Golden Temple in Amritsar and was joyfully eating berries. He looked down at Bhai Sahib and said: "Guru Nanak has taken me in. I am free! Here - have a berry...", and threw one at Bhai Sahib. This startled Bhai Sahib jee and he woke up.

Bhai Sahib was a deep researcher into spiritual matters. He realized this was no ordinary dream, therefore he noted down the day and time in his diary - it was 1:16 am. He also resolved to visit his friend that day.

Later that day, Bhai Sahib jee went to the hospital and found his friend's bed empty. Upon inquiry, he was told that his friend died at 1.16 am that morning.

~~~~~

A somewhat similar incident occurred recently. My Uncle passed away last year. He was an extremely spiritual person who spent all his life in meditation, keertan and Guru's service. When my Uncle's body died last year, his soul visited a man in Seattle that he spiritually loved very much. The man personally related this incident to me:

He said he was awoken up at 4am that day. He saw two figures standing near his bed - one close to him and one standing a few feet behind. The one in front was dressed quite royally and was glowing with light. Without a word, the figure gave a smile and a slight bow and vanished. Later that day, he found out about my Uncle's passing at 4am that morning and he realized it was he who had visited him.

A little bit of glimpse into my Uncle's spiritual life:

Once, in the 70s, he decided to recite Jap Ji for 2.5 hours for 40 days. He would do this at night while walking back and forth in his backyard. Quite interestingly (since his house was in the middle of the city) many snakes would suddenly appear in his path, hang around for a minute or so and disappear! He told me it was Maya (I never could figure that one out).

He also had a vision of the Sikh tenth master, Guru Gobind Singh jee, on two occasions. Once he was sitting in sangat (a congregation of people listening to keertan or in meditation) and he saw the tenth master walk up. This was so real that my Uncle stood up. The Guru held up his hand in my Uncle's direction as a way of blessing him. My Uncle bowed and the Guru vanished. Other people wondered why my Uncle was standing and bowing - he realized this and made a excuse of going out for a water break.

Another time, the Guru came to him while he was alone in his room in meditation (probably on one of his 40-day meditations - he was usually in the midst of one of them!). When my Uncle bowed to touch the Guru's feet, the Guru vanished again - my Uncle told me the next time the Guru shows up, he is going to keep one eye on the Guru when he bows!

Beloved

This story has a special place in my heart - it is based upon a vision of an enlightened soul who I dearly loved.

Now all I do is sit at the window and look toward the road for the message from my beloved...

~~~~~

Any day now the King would be sending for me. I would become his queen. Now that I am ready, the time seems to stretch more and more. Each moment without my Lord is an eternity to me now. Although I do all the chores, my eyes, my ears, my whole being is always at the window looking for the messenger from the Lord, my soon-to-be husband.

I look around the room I am living in. I will miss this place. I have a profound fondness for this place. This place prepared me for my marriage to the Lord. I remember the time when I was living an orphan's life in the village....

~~~~~

It was early morning and I had come out with all the girls to get water from the well. I enjoyed this activity the most. We would laugh and play all along the way. Even though I had no family, the villagers made me part of their lives. Along with the other girls, I too was given the responsibility of getting water to the village in the mornings.

The villagers tried their best to make me feel like one of the family. They would hug and kiss me along with their children but the warmth with which they hugged their own children would cause me to cry silently. But despite those moments of loneliness, I was happy. In fact, everyone lived happily and with peace. Perhaps the main cause of this happiness was our King.

Our King was benevolent and kind. He was generous and just. There was none like him and I was told there never had been or will be one like him. But his quality that shone the most was his love - his love for the people, his love for justice, his love for the world and all its creatures.

I had never seen him, of course. Only his queens could see him. It was a great mystery how these queens were chosen. No one seemed to know how the King would select an ordinary girl and make her a queen. All girls fantasized about being his queen.

Except me.

Looking back, I realize that the thought of me being a queen was beyond my imagination. There were so many beautiful, elegant and cultured girls that the King could choose from. I, on the other hand, was ugly and knew only simple words. To confess, I had several times fantasized about being one of his queens' servant. I imagined myself preparing food for her. Washing her clothes. Washing her feet with my hands. Fanning her on hot days. Living in her will. Looking after all her needs.

~~~~~

We were just a few feet from the well when we heard the sound of horses coming from the side of sunrise. We all looked at the approaching horses and the rider. The rider rode one horse and held the reins of another unmounted horse. The rider wore royal blue clothes and had two swords. We knew this was the King's rider.

My friend nudged me. Her whisper was urgent: "Don't look at the rider! Kneel down!"

I was ignorant of such things. Feeling rather foolish, I knelt down.

The rider came by and stood a few feet away from us, then approached our group.

I felt a tap on on my shoulder. I felt weak - surely I must have done something terribly wrong.

The rider said: "I bow to you. Be joyous, for you will be his queen."

My heart beat so fast that it was a wonder I did not faint.

Me! one of his queens.

Perhaps there had been a mistake. I shyly looked towards the rider and pointing to myself mumbled, "Me?"

The rider smiled, "Yes, you. Say your farewells, we leave soon for the Guru's abode."

Yes, it was true.

Me, an ignorant and dirty village girl, a queen! I felt drunk with joy.

~~~~~

The kind rider helped me on a horse. After a whole day of travel we reached a castle. A woman came out and took me down from my horse. I immediately took to liking her. She hugged me strongly. It was rather strange but this total stranger gave me the kind of hug I had been craving - even more strange was that I felt I had known her for a lifetime.

I thanked the rider and went inside. There were several women there. They were all extra-ordinarily beautiful. Some wore jewelry. The jewels did not resemble any jewels I had seen before. They seemed to be made of light and shone brilliantly. For a few moments I thought I was in the King's palace and these women were his queens.

I knelt down and bowing down I quickly said, "Forgive me, my queens, I know not manners."

There was silence for a moment. Then they all came and hugged me. With fondness, one of them said, "Dear Chhotee, not queens yet."

To date I do not know why she called me Chhotee, but the name felt familiar and I became to be known by that name.

The whole place felt rather warm and homely. It seemed to be permeated with love and life. I felt completely at ease here. Ma (the woman who had taken me off the horse - I didn't know her name, but somehow I started calling her Ma) told me to bathe. And with much fussiness and pampering she dressed me in a white robe. It was evening by then; after feeding me, she tucked me in a fine feather bed.

~~~~~

I was woken up by Ma . It was much before sunrise. Surprised I asked, "Am I going somewhere?" She just smiled and told me to bathe. Reluctantly I obeyed. Then she led me to a room where all the women were sitting and told me to do the same.

As soon as I sat down, I felt like I had never felt before - I felt as if I had grown to the size of the room. I felt I was somehow above my body. I could hear a soft chant of a Word which I had never heard before. This Word was no ordinary word. This Word was wondrous and magical.

Little did I know that this Word would become a dear companion who would never desert me. A Word that would cloth my nakedness forever. That would quench my thirst forever. That would fill my hunger forever. That would never leave my heart. That would play with me like a childhood friend. That would make the whole world my friend. That would make me sing with bliss. That would make me cry with joy. That would make me rich beyond all dreams. That would show me my dazzling, wonder-filled self.

That Word was "WaheGuru".

The time passed wonderfully and before I knew it, it was dawn. Then one of the women started reciting a verse. It was rather strange, because I did not know this language yet I completely understood what they were saying. It was praises of the King, his love, his greatness, his aliveness and his youthfulness.

Afterwards, we all ate. Ma took me aside and explained to me a few things, "You are indeed blessed, because you will be his queen one day. You are here for you must prepare yourself for him."

That was all. Quite surprised, for I had a million questions, I silently nodded. She understood my baffled look. All she said was, "Everything with due time."

As I was soon to discover, the women didn't talk much. Only the most necessary words were spoken. The Word "WaheGuru" was freely and openly spoken though. I too couldn't help but say the Word over and over again. The most amazing thing was that I didn't know what this Word meant, yet after a few days, I could not help but say it with my tongue, my mind and my heart. Even during sleep, I dreamt about it. It would start spontaneously in my heart the moment I woke up and no matter what I did, it continued all day. I simply could not understand it! I tried several times to ask the women, but all I got was smiles, hugs and an occasional, "Be patient now, Chhotee."

One day, Ma and I went out to get water. This was the first time we were alone since I had come here and I was determined to ask her about the Word.

As soon we were out of earshot, I immediately began: "Ma, pray, tell me one thing."

"WaheGuru?"

I nodded. Silently Ma took me to the edge of the well. She pointed to the water.

"What is that?" she asked.

I replied, "Water."

She said, "How do we get to the water?"

I thought awhile and said, "With the rope, of course... please ... Ma tell me about..."

She interrupted me, "My dear Chhotee, there is nectar inside your heart. Only when you are cleansed with it can you become a queen."

She continued after a pause, "Just like we need a rope to get to the water, similarly we need the Word to get to the nectar in our heart."

After that, she firmly motioned me not to talk anymore. Although, I didn't really understand her--I was after all a simpleton from the village--her words calmed me down and I resigned to patience.

~~~~~

Life here was simple and beautiful. I would wake up shortly after midnight. I would sit with the women and listen to the Word ring within me. At dawn, verses, which I too had memorized, were recited. Sometimes we would all sing. I looked forward most to the singing. During singing even I felt like one of the women. During singing we all--beautiful, ugly, jeweled and simple--became one throat, one mouth, one body, one being.

At the far side of the castle there was a special room. That was the Guru's room. Only few of the women would go there. These usually were the most beautiful ones. I never had any hopes to go there for I was not beautiful.

But despite my ugliness, I desired and longed to go there. I saw the happiness in the faces of the ones who were chosen to serve the Guru. Upon return, their eyes would be drunk with love and their faces would glow with bliss. They would walk without touching the floor.

But I knew I had no chance of ever seeing the Guru. Just being in the company of beautiful beings did not make one beautiful. Or so I thought....

One day, I especially longed to see the Guru. I had heard so much about the Guru's love and glow that I thought surely I would die without seeing the Guru. For the first time since I came here I felt unhappy, for I saw no hope for me ever serving the Guru. I was the ugliest one here. I was sitting feeling rather dejected in my room when Ma came in.

She laughed and said, "What's the matter, Chhotee?"

I could not conceal my desperation. Tears welled up in my eyes. "I want to see the Guru...," I blurted between tears, "but I am ugly and ...." Tears wouldn't let me finish my sentence.

She softly wiped my tears and motioned me to be quiet. She went and came back with a mirror (a rare commodity in the castle).

"Here, look at yourself in the mirror."

Still crying, I put the mirror in front of my face. To my utter astonishment I saw a most beautiful person in the mirror.

"I...?"

Ma smiled, "That is you!"

I looked and looked. Gone were the deformities. I was transfixed with my own beauty. I could not believe it was me. My eyes were as bright as the morning sun. My face shone like the moon.

To my even greater surprise, I wore jewels. Before I could ask, Ma said, "The jewels were always within you. The jewels show in the one who travels on the path of the Guru."

For the first time, I clearly understood the importance of that place. It had transformed a foolish, ill-mannered village girl into an enchanting angel.

~~~~~

Now I suddenly found myself changing from the inside too. Although I had noticed a change inside me a long time ago - I was much calmer and more patient than before. Now rather big changes started to take place. Whereas before I looked forward to being with the women to go out for walks and laughs, now I looked forward to being alone and looking at the wonders inside me. The colors inside me were so intense that I could look at them for eternity without my fill.

Then the blessed day came when Ma told me that I would be the one to serve the Guru with food the next day. Heart flooded with emotions, I could not sleep that night. There was fear too, since despite the wonderful things I had learnt here, I was still a simpleton at heart and knew no sweet words. I spent the whole night wondering how it would be to see the Guru.

But I could never have imagined how wonderful the next day would be...

When the blessed time came, Ma handed me the food plate. My hands shook, rattling the plate; and my heart pounded, making me shiver. Ma held my hand and calmed me with her looks.

I looked at Ma with uncertainty. "Now go," she said firmly.

For what seemed an eternity, I walked to the other side of the castle. The door of the Guru's room was open. As I approached the door I heard the most melodious music. It was like no music I had ever heard. It wasn't coming from any particular direction. To my surprise it was coming from within me. For a long time I stood there quite dumbfounded with utter astonishment. Only with a great amount of will did I break from the spell.

"How foolish I am, the food is getting cold!" I scolded myself.

I walked into the Guru's room.

I thought I had seen a lot of beautiful things outside me and within me. But I wasn't prepared for the Guru. Such beauty. Such grace. Such elegance. Such kindness. Such light. Such life. Such royalty. Such compassion. Such wonder. Such intensity. Such love. Such love. Such love...

It would not be right to say that I saw the Guru, rather I basked in the Guru's being. I danced in the Guru's being. I swam in the Guru's being. I overflowed with the Guru's being.

With much difficulty I put the food plate in front of the Guru. Despite my self, I collapsed at the Guru's feet and openly sobbed.

No! the Guru could not possibly love me so much.

No! I was not worth this grace.

No! I was dirty, I did not belong here.

No! the Guru could not love me so much.

No! so much love could not exist.

My heart could not contain the love that was pouring out of the Guru's feet. My body shook violently with sobs. I could not stand the feeling and I pleaded with the Guru, "Please, no ... not so much. I cannot bear it, please, I am not worthy," I cried out.

The Guru's kind hands touched my head. With the touch of the Guru's hand, I expanded beyond the room. The love from the hands filled me and kept on filling me. I kept expanding until I occupied many earths and many moons and many suns. Still the love kept filling me. I could get no bigger and I begged the Guru to stop the pouring of love.

My plea was heard. I stopped sobbing. I felt complete.

It could have been a moment or it could have been an eternity - I lay on the Guru's feet feeling fulfilled, warm, loved and at peace. It was as if I was home. It was as if I had found something I had been looking for many days, many months, many years, many eons, many lives. It was as if I finally found my center, my being, my beginning, my end, my life, my light, my love, my existence.

The Guru lifted my head. I quickly averted my eyes. I knew I had not enough strength to look at the Guru's face. Thousands of years of preparations could not have prepared me to look into the Guru's eyes. The Guru whispered, "WaheGuru."

The nectar Ma had told me about suddenly overflowed out of my heart. It filled my throat, it filled my eyes, it filled my head, it filled my whole being - my body, my mind, my soul. I shut my eyes and I saw the Guru inside my heart. I saw the Guru everywhere within me. I saw the Guru filling the whole room, the whole of the Earth, the whole of the universe. I was wonder-struck.

~~~~~

Then the gracious, kind, elegant, beautiful, fatherly, motherly Guru guided me to the source of all love. It was none other than the King. He was mine now. He was my Lord. He was my beloved.

Strangely I felt such love for him that in my heart of hearts I was already his and he was mine.

I rejoiced. He was mine and I his.
I sang. He was mine and I his.
I laughed. He was mine and I his.
I danced. He was mine and I his.
I loved. He was mine and I his.
I flew. He was mine and I his.

Finally! I belonged to someone. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his. I was his...

My training at the Guru's abode was complete. All that was left was to wait for my lord's messenger of love.

~~~~~

Now all I do is sit at the window and look toward the road for the message from my beloved...

ps: the vision of the enlightened soul I mentioned at the beginning of the story continued to an actual union with the Lord. But some things cannot be captured in words so I stop here...

Dhanna

Dhanna was a simple hearted farmer.

One day, Dhanna was passing a pundit's house who was "feeding" a stone idol. Dhanna was quite perplexed by this. So Dhanna asked the pundit about it. The pundit was kind of hungry and wanted to get this feeding over as soon as possible and really wasn't in a mood for Dhanna's simple inquiries.

He replied, "Oh, nothing, just feeding God. Now if you will excuse me..."

"Really?! What does God give you if you feed it?"

Pundit: "Everything. Now, I really must ask you to leave..."

Dhanna liked this idea of giving a little food and getting back everything! So Dhanna asked the pundit if he could also have a God to feed.

At this time, the pundit's stomach was audibly complaining about lack of food. So he hastily picked up the nearest stone off the ground and said, "Here! First feed it, then you eat. Goodbye!"

Saying that the pundit dived into the food left over by God. Dhanna held the stone closely and hurried home.

As soon as Dhanna got home, Dhanna cooked the best meal he could for God. He placed it in front of the stone and said, "Here God, please eat. Afterwards, I want to discuss many things with you. I need a new cow for example, but for now, please eat."

Saying that Dhanna sat in front of God and waited. And waited. And waited.

After a while, Dhanna said, "Look God, I really have no time for your silence. Come and eat at once! I have many chores to do."

After several hours, Dhanna was thinking that perhaps God was annoyed at him. So Dhanna tried to persuade God to forgive him: "Look here God, I haven't eaten in a while. Now it is entirely possible that I have done something to annoy you but believe you me, we can discuss this much better after we have some food is in our stomachs."

Slowly the night deepened. Dhanna said, "Look God, I have one nerve left and you are dancing on it. Either eat your food or I will....", Dhanna couldn't really think of anything so he just stomped his foot in anger.

Pretty soon, it became daylight. Now Dhanna was quite disoriented. Sometimes Dhanna would curse God, sometimes Dhanna would hug God and sometimes Dhanna would cry.

Two long and hungry nights passed in this manner. Then at early morning on the third day, when Dhanna was too weak to curse any more, WaheGuru decided to do the thing WaheGuru does best - play.

WaheGuru appeared inside the stone. It was the most beautiful human body that Dhanna had ever seen - it seemed to glow with light and life. Dhanna forgot all his fatigue and anger and hunger; and just gaped at WaheGuru.

WaheGuru stepped out of the stone and said, "Dhanna, sorry, I am late - had to deal with a couple of universe creations - but would you be kind enough to warm up the food?"

Dhanna, keeping one eye on WaheGuru, warmed up the food and presented it to WaheGuru. WaheGuru joyfully ate and fed Dhanna too.

It was daylight by then. Dhanna said, "Look God, I am tired - I haven't slept for 2 nights - and all I can think of is bed. You, on the other hand, haven't done much. How exhausting is sitting in that stone anyways? So if you don't mind, would you feed the cows while I take a short nap?"

When Dhanna woke up, WaheGuru had finished all the farm chores and prepared a delicious yogurt drink for Dhanna. Dhanna drank and said, "You know God, you are just too good. I don't know why but I feel so close to you. You feel like my best friend. In fact, you feel like ... me! Now lets go and work on the farm."

Saying that, Dhanna put his arms around WaheGuru and went to the farm.

Dhanna fell head over heels in love with WaheGuru. He couldn't resist being with WaheGuru. They spent the next few days literally arm in arm. Even at night, Dhanna would hold WaheGuru's hand and listen to WaheGuru's songs - WaheGuru sang a lot - and would drift off to sleep.

A week later, the pundit was passing Dhanna's hut. Dhanna saw him and ran to him and said, "Oh, you wonderful man, thank you so much for that God..."

Pundit, "What??? Oh, yeah, sure, anytime. Look, I am in a hurry. I am going to the conference KPPARR (Keeping Poor Poor And Rich Rich)."

Dhanna: "But please come and drink some yogurt-drink. God makes the best yogurt-drink."

Pundit: "What now? God makes something?"

Dhanna: "Oh, the best stuff. Just look at God - how beautiful!"

Pundit looked and indeed someone was pushing the cows on the farm. And yet there was nobody to be seen.

Pundit: "Who is that?"

Dhanna: "Why, that is God, of course. Oh, you should hear God sing..."

Pundit was quited intrigued by now. And repeatedly asked Dhanna about this strange phenomena. After a while Dhanna realized that Pundit could not see God. Dhanna promised that he would talk to God about this.

After the pundit left, Dhanna went to WaheGuru and said, "God, how come pundit can't see you?"

WaheGuru: "Oh ... mainly because he really doesn't want to see me. He is more interested in my maid - Maya."

Dhanna: "But I don't understand. How can one see you?"

WaheGuru: "One has to become pure. And in this age, Dhanna, the easiest way to become pure is by reciting the True Word."

Dhanna: "True Word?"

WaheGuru: "Yes, Sat Naam - Sat Naam is the magic of this age. Even a little bit of it will open your eye that is needed to see me."

Dhanna: "But, I haven't recited Sat Naam. How come I can see you?"

WaheGuru touched Dhanna's forehead - Dhanna went inside. Inside he saw that he, Dhanna, had done heavy religious efforts for over 100 lifetimes. He had stood in water all night and in the hot sun all day for many lifetimes. He had hung upside down for several others. He had been a celibate in one lifetime and a moni (ones who don't talk) in another. But he had progressed spiritually very little.

Then in his previous life, he had met an adept guru who had shown him how to recite Sat Naam. And by reciting Sat Naam for just one lifetime, Dhanna had become pure.

Dhanna fell at WaheGuru's feet and cried, "Please forgive this fool, I treated you as an equal..."

WaheGuru picked him and held him close, singing songs of comfort, "Dhanna, now the time is right for me to leave. The way you see me now is the superficial way of meeting me. The real way is inside. Now you must start Sat Naam again and then I will meet you inside."

Saying that WaheGuru vanished into thin air. Dhanna was enlightened now, else he would cursed WaheGuru. Immediately he started Sat Naam with each breath.

Within days, Dhanna met WaheGuru in WaheGuru's real form - the formless One - inside.

Lions

SukhChan Singh (from Nanaksar) personally related this true story to me...
It was during the anti-Sikh riots. I was at that time living in the Gurudwara (Sikh place of worship). There were 7 other people living there besides me. Trouble started brewing early in the morning. We noticed about 50 young men gathering outside a few hundred metres away from the Gurudwara. We didn't really pay too much attention to them.

By noon, the group had turned into a rowdy crowd of about 300. We became quite concerned at that point. Our telephone wires had been cut, so there really was not much we could do. But we were still in high spirits.

At about 3 pm, a truck driven by a Sikh was driving along when the crowd attacked it. The Sikh gave up the truck and ran to the Gurudwara. Some of the goons overtook him and injured him but he was a strong guy and managed to escape. Still, he was quite bloody when he came in. That increased our number to 9. The number outside had increased to about 500 by evening. They were very loud and obnoxious by now.

We tried to ignore them and began our evening program at 6 pm. But as the darkness approached, the rabble become more and more bold. In fact, soon they started stoning the gurdwara. We stopped the evening program and placed all the Guru Granth Sahibs in the safest place possible.

At 7.30 pm it was very dark and the rabble became so bold that they put fire to the gurdwara's gate. It hit us then how serious the situation was - we soon would be killed!

Our group leader (the Jathedaar) gathered us and said, "We have faced worse situations then this - we have gone through two holocausts but we live and will live in freedom forever! We have never given up and will never give up. The enemy stands outside - there are 500 hundred, we are 9 but remember Guru Gobind Singh jee (the Sikh 10th spiritual master) has made each of us equivalent to 125,000! Get prepared to fight!"

He said this in such high spirits that our body hair stood on their ends. Even though I had been seriously ill for the past 3 months, I too was ready to fight. He then told us that we must make two groups. The first group of five will go out first and fight the enemy. The the rest (4) can go later. Everybody agreed - he then chose 4 other men. I was not chosen, most probably due to my illness.

The five put on the martial uniform of the Sikhs. Then the Jathedar did prayer to Guru Gobind Singh jee saying, "Dear father, we are coming to your land. Please prepare for us!"

Then the five then took out their swords and with the Sikh war cry
BOLE SO NEHAAL! SAT SRI AKAL!
BOLE SO NEHAAL! SAT SRI AKAL!
(the one who utters "Sat Sri Akal" (timeless Truth) becomes blissful)
filling the air, came out the face the enemy. You will not believe what happened then. Seeing 5 Sikhs in the uniform of Guru Gobind Singh jee, the rabble of 500 ran away!

It was as if 5 lions were chasing 500 hyenas away!

WahDuu!

Translated from "Se Keneha" by Bhai Seva Singh

Once a lady came to Baba Harnaam Singh jee and said, "Baba jee, I have a brother who is physically and mentally disabled. He can neither hear or speak. He also has a difficult time walking. I used to take care of him but now I am married and must leave him behind. But I am afraid noone will take care of him after my departure. After much thought I have come to you, Baba jee, please take care of him. He is a simpleton and needs love and patience."

Baba Harnaam Singh jee was the personification of love and patience. He was a simple, beautiful Sikh who lived a life according to the Guru's will. He smiled and said, "Daughter, this is Guru Nanak's house. The Guru is the support of the support-less. Please bring your brother, the Guru will look after him."

The lady thanked him and next day, brought her brother to Baba jee. Her brother who was referred to as "Sadhu" was indeed a simpleton. His legs were quite bent which made his walk quite difficult and somewhat comical. Only with much difficult could he listen or speak. He also looked hungry, so Baba jee straight away sent him to the kitchen. After sometime the people from the kitchen came running to Baba jee and said that Sadhu has already eaten eight chapatis and wants more. "We are afraid he might get sick," they said. Baba jee laughed and said, "Let him eat his fill. Only the Guru's house can satiate the body and the soul."

Sadhu ate twelve chapatis before raising his arms in surrender and happiness.

Baba jee called him and said loudly in his ears, "WAHEGURU WAHEGURU!!"

Sadhu, after some difficult, started saying, "WahDuu WahDuu."

Baba jee was extremely happy and gave him a rosary and showed Sadhu how to use it. Sadhu took the rosary and started saying "WahDuu". At morning and evening time, Baba jee would call Sadhu to come and join him during singing and meditation. Sadhu also started to work in the farm. And he would always keep on saying "WahDuu WahDuu."

After three months, with the power of the mantra he became quite well both physically and mentally. He started walking much better and also could hear better. He now started saying "WaheGuru WaheGuru" correctly. He would never miss morning meditation and singing even though he did not understand anything.

After six months, Sadhu became quite normal. He could walk quite well. He took on several easy responsibilities in the kitchen. After a year or so, he became a baptized Sikh - he was renamed Sadhu Singh.

After that, many changes started taking place in Sadhu Singh. He would always say "WaheGuru". Even during sleep several people heard him say, "WaheGuru WaheGuru." In fact, Baba jee too once came to see him during sleep. After hearing this he was very pleased and remarked that "The guru has done grace on Sadhu Singh because he says "WaheGuru" all the time and does so much selfless service of others. In addition, he does not care for any fruit to bear from either of his actions. Indeed he does not even know the deeper meanings of Word-meditation and why it should be done - he simply does it with 100% of his mind and body. Also he neither hears anybody's slander nor does it. He is simple-hearted, therefore this spiritual miracle has happened."

Even more subtle spiritual things happened on Sadhu Singh. He started hearing un-struck sounds within him. Since he was still very much a simpleton at heart, he didn't really understand what the sound was and would often climb on the roof to see where this sound was coming from! He would also often complain, "Someone is playing music all the time and someone is singing "WaheGuru" - I can't even sleep because of this!" Then he would be very puzzled when other people told him that they couldn't hear any sounds.

Sadhu Singh became quite famous. A lot of people started believing that Sadhu Singh's words became true. And they would try to please him with clothes and food. His brother from Ludhiana, Punjab started visiting him regularly. One day his brother decided to take Sadhu Singh to Ludhiana.

Disaster struck! Sadhu Singh's brother had a television (this was a rarity in those days). Sadhu Singh, being a simpleton, immediately became engrossed with it. He spent a week in Ludhiana and he watched the television from start to end.

When Sadhu Singh came back, he was a different man. Although he still carried the rosary around and did "WaheGuru WaheGuru", his mind was engrossed with the scenes he had seen on television. In fact, he would tell anybody and everybody about it. He would say, "On the trolley (he called television "trolley"), there are mountains, women dancing, farms, even holy temples. People fight and die on trolley." Everyone was quite amused at first but then it became a serious problem since Sadhu Singh replaced praises of WaheGuru with praises of trolley! Baba Harnaam Singh jee too scolded him and told him to stop talking about television. Sadhu Singh nodded but still went on singing the trolley's praises. This lasted about two months. After that Sadhu Singh somewhat returned to his old self, but his spirituality diminished drastically. Although he didn't talk about the trolley that much, he was constantly thinking of it.

Then his spirituality was struck a fatal blow - his sister took him with her to Delhi. Sadhu Singh stayed with her for one full month and watched television to his heart's content. He became a total devotee of television.

Sadhu Singh became so engrossed with television that even when he came back to live with Baba jee he would still go to a nearby house at evening time to watch television. He no longer heard any un-struck. His Word-meditation too became a mere mouth function.